Stop Listening and Pay Attention

“Stop listening.”

It was not what I expected to hear from my counseling professor in seminary so I stopped doodling in my notebook and paid close attention.

“When you are with a couple, or a family, and what they are saying to you or to each other makes no sense to you, stop listening. Just look at them. Pay attention to how they sit – who is near and who is far. Look at how they move, toward or away from one another.”

I had been to so many seminars on listening. I had received and catalogued so many handouts and books on listening skills, that his lesson was both surprising and revolutionary. Continue reading “Stop Listening and Pay Attention”

Amazing Grace and The Pentatonic Scale

Turn your sorrows into song – a great way to celebrate every day as a day of Easter possibility.

Lift Somebody Up

In the Gospel of Mark, one of Jesus’ first healings was a paralyzed man whose friends got him to Jesus in a crowded house by lowering him through the roof. Here is the story from Mark 2: Continue reading “Lift Somebody Up”

James Taylor and The Wise Men – Home by Another Way

Today is Epiphany, when the Magi came to the end of their journey following the star and encountered Christ in a poor home in Bethlehem. To have been on such a journey, to have been surprised by God in such an unexpected way, they had to be changed. James Taylor tells the story of their transformation in Home by Another Way

Those magic men the Magi, some people call them wise or Oriental, even kings.
Well anyway, those guys, they visited with Jesus, they sure enjoyed their stay.
Then warned in a dream of King Herod’s scheme, they went home by another way.
Yes, they went home by another way, home by another way.
Maybe me and you can be wise guys too and go home by another way.
We can make it another way, safe home as they used to say.
Keep a weather eye to the chart on high and go home another way.
Continue reading “James Taylor and The Wise Men – Home by Another Way”

Give The World a Gift This Christmas

In this season of giving and receiving gifts to those we love, or those whose name we drew in an office party Secret Santa, reflect on this question, “What can I give the world?” If this is the season for celebrating when God so loved the world, God gave… What can you give the world?

Here is a song by Mipso, a trio formed in the fall of 2010 in Chapel Hill, North Carolina when Jacob, Joseph, and Wood were students at UNC – Chapel Hill. They graduated in May 2013, and took the show on the road.

The hope for the world is to “leave this wicked winter just a couple of acres greener when I go.”

Grinch thought, ‘What if Christmas…?’

Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn’t before!
What if Christmas, he thought, doesn’t come from a store.
What if Christmas…perhaps…means a little bit more!
Dr. Seuss

Live Your Moments: Recognize – It’s All Made Up

In a lot of family vans, they have movie players so the kids can watch movies while they ride along. You can’t do that while driving, believe me… not that I’ve done it. I don’t have to. I just replay them in my mind. I have them stored, in my brain. Apparently my storage space was full by the time I was twelve because all I have in my mind is movies from childhood.
So, while driving down the long highway, The Wizard of Oz started playing. I can’t decide on who I think is scarier Ms. Gulch on her bicycle, or the Wicked Witch. If you throw in the flying monkeys, I have to say the Wicked Witch, but before that I’d say it’s a tie.
Then, because I am a preacher, I can’t just replay The Wizard of Oz in my mind, I had to consider them philosophically, “Which place is real, is it Kansas or is it Oz?”
Think about it. If you’re first thought is, ‘Of course Kansas real. Oz is made up. It’s just a story, a product of someone’s imagination. Not Kansas. I’ve been to Kansas.’ I must point out to you, in the movie Kansas is in black and white while Oz is in color.
Continue reading “Live Your Moments: Recognize – It’s All Made Up”

For Fathers, Sons, and Daughters

In Matthew 6, Jesus taught his followers to pray in this way, “Our Father…”

As we approach Father’s Day, with a celebration of dads heavenly and otherwise, I see a parallel between God the rest of us regulars, we all want the same for our children, to grow, to become, to live, and to love. As my son Nathan continues to grow into his teenage year and is gaining wrestling skill from camp and club, I am well aware that it won’t be long until my son pins his father. For the hopeful continued growth for Cayla, Abbie, and Nathan, and to encourage all of us to continue to grow and encourage growth in each other, I offer this simple poem by Orval Lund that he wrote for his father.
Wrist-wrestling father
Orval Lund
for my father

On the maple wood we placed our elbows
and gripped hands, the object to bend
the other’s arm to the kitchen table.
We flexed our arms and waited for the sign.
I once shot a wild goose.
I once stood not twenty feet from a buck deer unnoticed.
I’ve seen a woods full of pink lady slippers.
I once caught a 19-inch trout on a tiny fly.
I’ve seen the Pacific, I’ve seen the Atlantic,
I’ve watched whales in each.
I once heard Lenny Bruce tell jokes.
I’ve seen Sandy Koufax pitch a baseball.
I’ve heard Paul Desmond play the saxophone.
I’ve been to London to see the Queen.
I’ve had dinner with a Nobel Prize poet.
I wrote a poem once with every word but one just right.
I’ve fathered two fine sons
and loved the same woman for twenty-five years.
But I’ve never been more amazed
than when I snapped my father’s arm down to the table.

Let Your Light Shine

I’m preaching today on the light of the world passage from the Sermon on The Mount in Matthew 5:

Matthew 5: ¹³“You are the salt of the earth; but if salt has lost its taste, how can its saltiness be restored? It is no longer good for anything, but is thrown out and
trampled under foot. ¹⁴“You are the light of the world. A city built on a hill cannot be hid. ¹⁵No one after lighting a lamp puts it under the bushel basket, but on the lampstand, and it gives light to all in the house. ¹⁶In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father in heaven.

I am amazed at how different images from a scripture I’m living with during the week come to the surface when I’m thinking through my lenses of a Biblical passage. So often we make Jesus a person who is one in a billion, a person like no other, and, I believe, we miss where Jesus’ identity and life point us.

Continue reading “Let Your Light Shine”

A Tigger or an Eeyore?

Galatians 5:²²By contrast, the fruit of the Spirit is love, JOY, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, ²³gentleness, and self-control.

Randy Pausch began his famous Last Lecture telling of his diagnosis,
   If you look at my CAT scans, there are approximately 10 tumors in my liver, and the doctors told me 3-6 months of good health left. That was a month ago, so you can do the math… So that is what it is. We can’t change it, and we just have to decide how we’re going to respond to that. We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand.
   Pausch goes on to say later in the lecture,
   …you just have to decide if you’re a Tigger or an Eeyore . I think I’m clear on where I stand on the Tigger/Eyore debate. Never lose the childlike wonder. It’s just too important. Continue reading “A Tigger or an Eeyore?”

Why Jesus Died

To this day, I am haunted by a sermon that I heard. The church is Ebenezer Baptist in Atlanta where Martin Luther King, Jr. and Sr. both preached. I was there with a seminary group on the Sunday before Easter.
The preacher asked, “Why did Jesus have to die?” We thought about it while he went on to describe all the details of Jesus trial, beating, crucifixion and death?
He asked again, “Why did Jesus have to die?” Then described the scene of Jesus death again.
Then he said, “There is one thing I want to know? Why was Jesus alone? Where were the disciples?” We all knew they were off hiding. Continue reading “Why Jesus Died”

One Solitary Life

When you’re not sure whether or not what you might do today or who you might contact has meaning, remember Jesus as reflected in James Allen Francis.

One Solitary Life
by James Allen Francis (1926)

He was born in an obscure village
The child of a peasant woman
He grew up in another obscure village
Where he worked in a carpenter shop
Until he was thirty when public opinion turned against him
He never wrote a book
He never held an office
He never went to college
He never visited a big city
He never travelled more than two hundred miles
From the place where he was born
He did none of the things
Usually associated with greatness
He had no credentials but himself
He was only thirty three
His friends ran away
One of them denied him
He was turned over to his enemies
And went through the mockery of a trial
He was nailed to a cross between two thieves
While dying, his executioners gambled for his clothing
The only property he had on earth
When he was dead
He was laid in a borrowed grave
Through the pity of a friend
Nineteen centuries have come and gone
And today Jesus is the central figure of the human race
And the leader of mankind’s progress
All the armies that have ever marched
All the navies that have ever sailed
All the parliaments that have ever sat
All the kings that ever reigned put together
Have not affected the life of mankind on earth
As powerfully as that one solitary life

From poet to psychologist, Scott Peck observed, The whole course of human history may depend on a change of heart in one solitary and even humble individual…. For it is in the solitary mind and soul of the individual that the battle between good and evil is waged and ultimately won or lost. Who knows, maybe you’re the one solitary individual who will change the course of history – maybe it’s today!

Practices for New Life in The New Year

Moment Practices

Whether it is the best of times
or the worst of times,
it is the only time we have.
Art Buchwald

Confessing my own limitations, I am very unzen-like, uncalm, unquiet, in internally nonpeaceful. My moments go by worried too much about the future, trying to prelive all possible events, or regretting my past and attempting to avoid reliving any painful past experience. “Now,” “being present,” and “in the moment” are foreign to me.

Though a pastor, I find the teachings of Jesus more difficult than the creeds about virgin birth, resurrection, or ascension. I struggle more with passages like this one from The Sermon on the Mount,

Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air; they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And can any of you by worrying add a single hour to your span of life?

In order to learn what I do not comprehend, we started a community in Nashville focused on singers and songwriters that we called The Moment. The blog posts that follow are some of our practices that have helped us to become more present beginning with this one,

Continue reading “Practices for New Life in The New Year”

New Year’s Transformation: One Step at a Time

I love musicians. I don’t just love them for the songs the create, I love them for the lessons they share. As a pastor, we miss what musicians take for granted.

Practice: No matter how good you get as a musician, you still need to practice. Religious people often forget that no matter what your faith – it takes practice.

New Songs: No matter how proficient an artist is, there are always new songs to learn. Too often we religious approach our sacred scriptures as if “God said it. I believe it. That settles it.” The United Church of Christ holds, and I agree, “God is still speaking.” No matter how many times you’ve heard a story, you can hear it in a new way as God can use any moment to bring forth a new creation.

Work is Play: Musicians play music. Religious people make sacrifices. For someone working at what they love, with people they love, you may give, you may even give up, but when it’s for the greater song, it’s not a sacrifice because it’s part of what you love. Religious folks seldom play. Perhaps a new statement for some could be, “In Christ we play…”

Moments Lead to Moments: Musicians finish a song. The song must end because if you keep playing it, you’ll ruin it. (Check out John Fogerty’s version of “I Heard It Through The Grapevine.”) Religious people try and live forever without ever facing an ending. For musicians, the end of one moment leads to the next.

One Step at a Time: Musicians learn about steps. You can’t take all steps at once. You can only take them one step at a time.

If you are making some big changes in your life this year, don’t resolve to do it all at once. Take it one beat, one moment, one step at a time.

Here is a wonderfully encouraging song for taking your steps, whether one step, twelve steps, or a journey of a million miles, take them as Mike Zito suggests. “One Step at a Time.”

Beyond Christmas to Christ – Good News for the New Year

Do you ever hear voices from your childhood? I do. I can still hear the promises. Like my parents, as they assured me, if I worked hard, then my hard work would pay off as I could create a life for myself and my future family.
I can still hear my teachers, encouraging me to study hard for every challenge, promising me if I would apply myself, get good grades, then I could go to any college I wanted and have whatever career I chose. I was eight. I did not know if I wanted to go to college. I didn’t know if you needed to go to college to be an astronaut. They assured me that I did.
From my coaches, I still can hear their voices, calling me by my last name, “Jones! Hustle! Get in the game! Get in the game!” The promise was there, if I worked hard, I might get to become a ‘starter’. I never made it. I was too slow. There wasn’t a sport that by the time I got off the bench and into the game, half the season wasn’t over. Still, I can hear them pushing me onward so that one day, I could drink from the cup of glory, whatever that was.
Among those voices, promising rewards for my effort, there was one other. A mysterious, legendary giant of a man. He promised me rewards for being good, tangible gifts of my own choosing to celebrate just how good I had been. He watched over me, paying close attention to who and how I was at home and at school, keeping track of everything I did, assuring me that if I was just good enough, I could make “The List”. He got me so excited about what I might get that I could barely sleep trusting that I had been a good boy and would make the cut. I still remember what we said about him, what we sang about him.

He’s making a list. He’s checking it twice,
gonna find out who’s naughty or nice…
He sees you when you’re sleeping,
he knows when you’re awake.
He knows when you’ve been bad or good,
so be good for goodness sake!

Besides being the mascot for Macy’s, Santa gives the basic message of society, the one we were all raised to believe, and the one we’ll likely pass on to our children, our cultural crowd’s norm: Do good, be good, and guaranteed, you’ll be rewarded. Do poorly, be bad, and sooner or later, guaranteed, you’ll be punished.
That’s what the shepherds must have been thinking when the angel appeared in the sky, “Uh-oh! Here it comes!” Punishment was surely on the way. The King James version states, “They were sore afraid,” which, to my young ears, always meant so scared it hurt.
The angel told them, “Fear not…” those beautiful words spoken on the first Christmas and the first Easter by messengers from God, “Fear not…” Perhaps the shepherds relaxed a little, realized they were in the midst of something wonderful, the work of God, not the typical reward and punishment, but good news… of grace.
“Fear not for behold I bring you tidings of great joy, for unto is born this day, in the city of David, a savior, who is Christ the Lord!”
“Fear not… for unto you…” Grace. The best Christmas gift ever.
Read more about life beyond Reward and Punishment in: Out of the Crowd front cover 21

What’s Your Christmas I.Q.?

Perhaps no other time of year proves the saying of Lao Tzu, “Those who think they know, don’t.” Try this Christmas quiz and see if you know as much as you think you do…

1. Joseph was originally from… (Luke 2:3)
A. Bethlehem
B. Nazareth
C. Hebron
D. Jerusalem
E. None of the above

2. What does the Bible say that the Innkeeper said to Mary and Joseph? (Luke 2:7)
A. “There is no room in the inn.”
B. “I have a stable you can use.”
C. “Come back later and I should have some vacancies.”
D. Both A and B
E. None of the above

3. A manger is a…
A. Stable for domestic animals
B. Wooden hay storage bin
C. Feeding trough
D. Barn

ANSWERS:
1. A. He worked and currently lived in Nazareth, but he was returning to Bethlehem – “his own city” (See Luke 2:3).
2. E. In the Bible, the innkeeper didn’t “say” anything (See Luke 2:7)
3. C. Feeding trough

How many did you answer correctly? Want to learn more? Here is the whole test: Christmas Quiz

Give the World a Gift this Christmas

The hope for the world is to “leave this wicked winter just a couple of acres greener when I go.”

How will the world be better because you’ve been here?

Live Your Moments: Let Your Soul Sing

Can a commercial carry the impact of a hymn? This one does. In a rollicking fashion, this Discovery Channel video carries an awe and wonder in response to the classic hymn, “How Great Thou Art.” See if you don’t think so.

Likely the Psalmist in Psalm 8 felt a similar joy:

Psalm 8

Divine Majesty and Human Dignity

To the leader: according to The Gittith. A Psalm of David.

¹O Lord, our Sovereign,
how majestic is your name in all the earth!

You have set your glory above the heavens.
² Out of the mouths of babes and infants
you have founded a bulwark because of your foes,
to silence the enemy and the avenger.

³When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers,
the moon and the stars that you have established;
⁴what are human beings that you are mindful of them,
mortals^[a] that you care for them?

See in New Ways

In John 3, Nicodemus comes to Jesus at night because Jesus, as a teacher or Rabbi, doesn’t fit any of Nicodemus’ categories and labels for just how a teacher should act, while at the same time, he was doing far more works of God than those with tenure in the religious world.

Jesus bothers Nicodemus even more when he tells him to be “Born again.”

Nicodemus imagines what a shock that would be to his mother.

Throughout the gospels, Jesus challenges stuck people to think in new ways.

Creativity guru, Michael Michalko, takes a normal creative challenge and then adds twist after twist. What used to be one creative solution to a problem, Michalko adds solution after solution. To begin to grasp Jesus’ teachings in the moments of our lives, we must be open to new ways of seeing. Perhaps Michalko’s exercise will help.

Continue reading “See in New Ways”

Live Your Moments: Be a Child of Your Heavenly Father

Back in my hometown of Anderson, SC, Carrie and I were in that auto line of cars following a funeral. I was trying to figure out my position in line behind the hearse. A man I had met earlier came up to the car. I rolled down the window. “Are you Ben’s boy?”
“Ben.” I had not heard that name in so long from anyone outside my family.
As the manager of a textile mill, in my childhood neighborhood, my father had been the king, the patriarch, but I long ago moved from there and from then. I switched towns and states. No one knew me as “Ben’s boy,” or “Ben’s son.” To hear that name washed over me and I was twelve years old again.
“Yes, sir,” I said with pride.
My father died when I was 18, three decades ago. I have moved far from anyone who knows him, but this man did. This man in a way knew me that others don’t, not even Carrie. He knew me as “Ben’s son”. With pride I said, “Yes, sir.”
As a youth, my father and I fought. He had an image from me as a future man far different from the one I was trying to become. In my mind, it was an either or proposition.
As I’ve gotten older, I see my relationship with my father as a both and, I am “Ben’s Boy,” yet at the same time, “My Own Man.” I have become far different than either of us envisioned, but now I can claim them both.
A Father’s love enables and empowers us to become both claimed by our Dad’s, and at the same time, grow unto something more than the images our father has for us or we have for ourselves, we can become the Imago Dei, the image of God, Our Father who art in heaven, and on earth, and in us, hopefully more and more each day.
“Are you Ben’s boy?”
Yes, I am.
“Are you God’s child?”
Yes, I am.
Prayer: Gracious God, on this Father’s day and every day here after, may I give my own son an example to follow and the freedom to find his own path. If it’s not to much to ask, could you arrange for my own father and I to have ‘a catch’ in a mystical corn field/baseball diamond in Iowa? Until then, tell my father I said, “Hello,” and that I’m still proud to be Ben’s boy.”